Another teenager living for Christ

Same ol' Same ol' Same ol'... why doesn't life change? Because life is happy to stay the same...
Hey everyone... I posted an entry that looked kinda like this in my friends only part. As you know this journal is friends only. However, this one entry, I will make the exception. I'm posting this so anyone anywhere can read it. Regardless of who they are...

Hey all... I don't know how I think up these random quotes for subjects in my head. They just pop in there. But it's true. I come here and I update and it's the same thing every day. I complain about something. I tell something good (if there's something good to tell), and I talk about all the bad things (hence more complaining). Sometimes I throw in a song to spice things up, or an interesting article about nice guys lol, but quite frankly, it's same ol' same ol' same ol'. And for those of you who come back here and read this all the time, I salute you. I don't know if I could do the same. I look at other people's journals and I wonder why mine isn't quite as interesting. Ya know why? Because I update this every single day and there aren't usually drastic changes day to day. There's no suspense, it's always up to date my life news. I also look a little deeper. Maybe what draws you all to reading my journal is drama. Maybe you think I'm the biggest loser on the planet for saying all the things that I do. Maybe you think I am just a pessimist who looks at the world from an "upside-down glass". Well you're probably all right. I'm probably all of these and more. Drama queen, unoriginal, pessimist, loser, idiot, sinner, arguer, but I hope one thing shines through more than all, a lover. Throw that positive in the mix of negatives and I hope it at least cancels out part of one of those things... I try my best not to hate people, I try to love all unconditionally... some more than others heh... I know and you know good and well I'm not a good role model. Anyone who looks in this journal can look at it and say, "Man he's just a pessimist and a drama queen. What a loser. And he calls himself a Christian?" And, I've had people post anonymous comments on my ujournal somewhat to that extent at times. I know good and well that looking at this journal you can read what you want and take from it what you want. There's nothing new in my life. Things are the same. You read this every day and most of my entries focus on the bad. You look at it and say "all he does is focus on the bad". That's true. I'm sorry for that. I guess I'm a pessimist by nature. But as I said before. I hope that my love for people, if you can read into that in any entry you've read, makes a small dent in that pessimism. Makes a little scratch in the stupidity. So I want to say in this entry, don't expect a miraculous change from me. Don't expect all my entries to be optimistic, don't expect me to stop talking about certain things, or how depressed certain things make me. I can't promise that. In fact I can almost guarantee that will NOT be the case. Why? Because like I said in the title... life is happy to stay the same. My life has not changed big time since I truly devoted my life to Christ. That was a major change. Since then I am still what I am. A loser, a drama queen, a pessimist, an arguer, a sinner... You name it I've probably got it. But if you would just take the time and read a little deeper into my entries. Just for a brief moment and see past the negativity. Look past the pessimism. Glimpse around the depression. And see me not for all that, but as a human being, a sinner, but a guy who loves all the people who surround him, everyone who touches his life. I don't have any desire to become famous, I'd really rather not. But when I leave this earth, or this city, or this journal, I just want people to think of me fondly, not as the negative crotchity old 19 old. I hope that people can remember me and say "ya know that Thomas, he was never perfect. But he was a good friend and he loved people. And you KNEW he loved people just the way he treated them." One day I want people to say that about me. If I can do that, then that's truly what my life's about. The greatest commandment, love the Lord God with all your heart mind and soul. And love your neighbor as yourself. So I just wanna say it one more time and I'll end this boring long entry. When you look at me, or you look at my life and my entries... it's easy to see the negatives. The negativity in itself being a big part. But take a brief moment, realize I'm human, and look for the positive. If only one thing you all would ever do for me, don't see me for the negative, but for the positive. I'll never be the greatest friend you ever had, I'll never even BE that great a friend to some of you. But I just hope that you know that I love each and every one of you. And I hope you can see my love, not just to you, but to all. Amidst the negativity there will always be love...

Ecclesiastes 1:5-9: "The sun rises and the sun sets, and hurries back to where it rises. The wind blows to the south and turns to the north; round and round it goes, ever returning on its course. All streams flow into the sea, yet the sea is never full. To the place the streams come from, there they return again. All things are wearisome, more than one can say. The eye never has enough of seeing, nor the ear its fill of hearing. What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun."

Always yours truly.
Thomas

LOTZ OF LOVE...<3

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